April 13, 2013 was the first time Rob and I have been able to go church since Reagan was born. Man, it was amazing to go and see our friends and sing and worship and just be in the place we have called our church home for the past four years or so. Sure we went to one of the services where the attendance is a little light…which was actually good, I look forward to bringing Reagan to that service…and hope she loves the loud music (at least it will drown out her cries for other attendees until I can get out the door and into the lobby).
The message was the story about the talents…more on that in a minute; first I want to talk about how one song in particular just struck a chord in me. And my lovely friend Ashley was singing it…when my friends are up there singing, I tend to love the songs even more.
The song is by All Sons and Daughters and it’s called “You have called me higher”. The message is basically saying…I could sit here and just wait for God to do something. I could remain status quo and stay the same person, never changing, never growing, never letting any walls that are built up inside of me come down. And I could be average, ordinary…and blend in with the rest of the world.
BUT…
God has called me higher, He has called me deeper…and I’ll go where He leads.
Gosh, I totally FEEL God moving in my life. Walking into church and talking to people who say, “I love reading your blog and hearing about Reagan and what God is doing…I’m praying she will be healed too…” It’s weird that people are following along, but also encouraging and makes me so glad I have the friends and church that I do, and that we all DO life TOGETHER in prayer and friendship.
More than feeling good that what we’re writing makes sense, draws people in and that they’re actually reading and caring about us…I feel that God is using us. He’s using Reagan…He’s doing something in OUR lives. The God of this universe has said, “You! Rob and Anne-Marie!! I am calling you higher, deeper…Go where I lead you.”
The amazing thing is that God actually wants this for all of his creation.
Rob and I look at each other and shake our heads sometimes…did we ever think our lives would include adopting a baby? No. Do we feel like God has led us to this place? Yes. And we feel like Reagan couldn’t be anywhere else but in our arms. I look at her sometimes and just think:
“You don’t realize what has happened to lead you to us. The decision your birthmother made when she picked us. The decisions we made exactly nine months prior to your birth to pursue adoption. You don’t know how many people are praying for you, and how God has chosen to shine a light right on your life and your precious, unfolding story.
You don’t know yet that someone else carried you and then placed you in my arms. You just know that your daddy and I love you, and we care so much about you that it brings us to tears to think of the orchestrating that God did to make your story land in our lap. You don’t know yet…but everyone is watching.”
Everyone is watching…and the master, He is also watching.
The message in church was the story about the talents. The value of a “talent” translated would be about 20 years wages back then…close to $400,000 today. So, the master goes off and gives talents to his servants…he entrusts those talents to them. It would be like giving an investor this money to do something with. Imagine giving one investor $2 million, another $800,000 and yet another investor $400,000.
“For the kingdom of heaven is like a man traveling to a far country, who called his own servants and delivered his goods to them. And to one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one, to each according to his own ability; and immediately he went on a journey. Then he who had received the five talents went and traded with them, and made another five talents. And likewise he who had received two gained two more also. But he who had received one went and dug in the ground, and hid his lord’s money.” Matthew 25:14-18
Could you imagine if you gave your money to an investor and he just buried it? You entrusted something of value to him…and he did not care for it the way he should have…the way you would have.
God has entrusted Rob and I to care for Reagan, and she’s worth far more than any monetary amount. To whom much is given, much is expected…I feel that any parent must feel this responsibility. B/c no matter how a child comes into your life…the entrusting involved is at the highest level.
God gives all of us talents, gifts, things we’re good at. Are we going to bury them? God also provides a way for you do what he’s called you to do, to multiply those talents and gifts. You might not know what that looks like, and it’s OK. I don’t know what it looks like half the time either, but I was reminded to let God lead…and I will follow the leader.
All Sons and Daughters Lyrics and video below
I could just sit
I could just sit and wait for all Your goodness
Hope to feel Your presence
And I could just stay
I could just stay right where I am and hope to feel You
Hope to feel something again
And I could hold on
I could hold on to who I am and never let You
Change me from the inside
And I could be safe
I could be safe here in Your arms and never leave home
Never let these walls down
But You have called me higher
You have called me deeper
And I’ll go where You will lead me Lord
You have called me higher
You have called me deeper
And I’ll go where You lead me Lord
Where You lead me
Where You lead me Lord
And I could hold on
I could hold on to who I am and never let You
Change me from the inside
And I could be safe
I could be safe here in Your arms and never leave home
Never let these walls down
But You have called me higher
You have called me deeper
And I’ll go where You will lead me Lord
You have called me higher
You have called me deeper
And I’ll go where You lead me Lord
Where You lead me
April 26th, 2013 at 2:15 pm
Anne-Marie, I love your blog, and you hold such a precious gift from in your arms. Your photo brought tears to my eyes. Yes, EVERYONE is watching especially the father, and he has a huge smile on his face. God bless you, Rob and Reagan!!!
April 27th, 2013 at 2:46 pm
I love reading your messages and seeing pictures of Reagan. So glad she is doing well. She looks very healthy and happy in the picture. Again congratulations to you and Rob. Parenting is one of the biggest responsibilities that God gives us. I remember when my children were young I questioned if I was doing a good job raising them. Now that they are grown with families of their own and careers, I can see that I did alright and hopefully God is smiling. May God continue to bless you, Rob and Reagan. It sounds to me you are on the right track!!!
May 13th, 2013 at 12:59 pm
Hi Anne Marie. We don’t know each other but I went to Canterbury with your husband! I was just scrolling through Facebook after work this morning and came across your blog. I want you to know that what you have said about how you can choose to be ordinary and blend in or you can be different and rise up and follow the path God has laid on your heart has really hit home. I really needed to hear this loud and clear. I really feel like God has spoken to me through what you wrote! I have been an RN for nearly 8 years and have put off going back to school for many trivial reasons; procrastination, fear of failure, fear of choosing the wrong major ect. You know it is something God wants you to do when you can’t stop thinking about it. I finally made a decision applied to USF in Tampa to pursue a Masters in nursing and focus on family medicine. We always hope we get a sign from God that we are doing the right thing and this post was my answer from Him. Thank you 🙂 keep writing I enjoy reading about your beautiful daughter!
May 13th, 2013 at 2:59 pm
Jaime, that is awesome! I’m so glad you are following in the path God is laying out for your life…that’s when you’ll truly start living 🙂